Sunday, May 26, 2019

Building A Better Mousetrap

We’ve all heard the old adage; ‘build a better mousetrap and the world will beat a path to your door,’ but this will do nothing about the mouse problem and it will just leave you with an unsightly path beaten into your nice front lawn.
The reason it will do nothing about the mouse problem is that mice tend to be sort of clever about traps and invariably figure out how to escape or avoid each new trap.
But as we all know, we all hate meeses to pieces!
So what’s the solution?
What I propose is the final solution to bring about an end to all meeses in our time, and it is just this; make the mouse crave the trap.
This would be easier than it might at first sound, for the following reasons.
Mices are neither individually all that bright nor capable of independent thought. They tend to hand together in social groups and rely on the opinions of certain authority figures within the group. This is actually how they learn to avoid traps, the opinion leaders or smarter mice teach the others about the traps.
So all we have to do is show the meeses pictures of these opinion leader mice owning traps. We can buy the cooperation of these opinion leaders with cheese.
In other words, make it socially acceptable for mice to own their own traps. It can be made into a status thing, showing pictures of the better meese putting their friends into their traps as a sort of party game or something.
Once we have established group approval of owning traps, we move directly into the next phase, which is getting the meese to  put their selves into their own traps and springing them.
We do this through a well organized propaganda campaign since is a well-established fact that, if you repeat anything often enough, mice begin to accept it as fact.
The propaganda campaign is basically that PAIN IS PLEASURE and DEATH IS FULFILLMENT.
Once we have successfully changed the meeses attitudes about traps they buy their own traps, jump into them and spring them on their selves thus saving us a lot of money invested on development of new traps and cheese.


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